Retiring from fake sports

For the first time in at least six years, I am not participating in a fantasy football league (FFL). It is not that I do not have the time (well, at least that is not the principle reason), but instead that I did not want to put forth the effort of badgering the league commissioner into re-opening it.

For the un-indoctrinated, FFL is an online simulation of what would happen if you took players from all 32 NFL teams and each participant “drafted” his or her favorite players. Each week, the players on your roster are scored based on their performance in a real game (number of yards rushed, interceptions returned, field goals kicked, etc.). The scoring is a complicated formula and varies widely by FFL provider. Your roster’s points are totaled to come up with a team score, which is then matched in a round-robin style of scheduling against other league members.

The most time consuming aspect of fantasy football is managing your rosters. You can only have a certain number of players “active” so that their performance score is counted in the team total. A participant must watch the schedule (if an NFL is on a bye-week, no performance points are recorded) and figure out which players among your choices are bringing in the most hypothetical points.

Most fantasy football leagues of any decent size have three kinds of participants. The die-hards buy a stat book from last season and agonize of who they start or sit. The casual players login ever couple of weeks to see how they ar doing. The no-shows do not bother to ever update their roster. As it is all a game of chance, no particular kind of participant performs better than another on a given week.

I really just want the hockey season to start.


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